TITTLE TATTLE AND TITBITS

CATS AND DOGS
The Sunday People reports that the Butcher's boy still bears a grudge against Govan's lad.

`MARTIN EDWARDS rarely misses a point-scoring opportunity over his old adversary Sir Alex Ferguson and the latest example can be found in Manchester United's forthcoming yearbook.

In an address to the club's supporters, the Old Trafford chairman can barely contain himself with compliments on the team's "excitement and entertainment" - despite their failure to win a pot - but somehow manages to conceal his delight at Fergie's decision to stay at United.'

2002 WORLD CUP THE VIDEO
`DAVID BECKHAM'S World Cup journey is over, but the England skipper has a lasting memento after recording hours of footage from South Korea and Japan on his digi-cam.

Becks' fly-on-the-wall video is earmarked for his son, Brooklyn, and heavily pregnant wife Posh Spice... but the TV companies have already been scrambled.

The Manchester United midfield wizard could name his own price, but he has no intention of making it public. Becks has plenty of footage from the win over Argentina,' reports The People

CHEATING SCOUSER ALERT?
`RAY STUBBS is denying claims he has dyed his hair - even though the BBC anchorman yesterday appeared alongside greying pundits Mark Lawrenson and Mick McCarthy with his barnet looking a touch darker than normal.

Stubbs, however, reckons it was a case of "a couple of days in the sun" rather than any Beckham-like hair trends, reports The People.

[yeah, right, cos hair goes DARKER in the sun, dunnit? Stubbs, Owen, Diouf....WCup crims, all]

DARWINISM IN ACTION PART 99
4 dead in Turkey after QF celebrations went a little haywire. 12 injuries by bullets-in-air too

GOD MOVES IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS
Observer notes that the face of David Beckham has been discovered in a Jaffa cake by a surrey man. [Dave 1, Mother Theresa 0]

ITALIAN RUMOUR OF DAY
Viera and Del Piero to be swapped.