'Just when Manchester United appeared to be gathering momentum, dipping a toe in the title race and thumbing a nose at their embittered rivals, they were swept away by the adventure of Portsmouth. The size of the victory was put in perspective as Harry Redknapp reeled through his team sheet.
David Unsworth? "He’d had it when we took him," the Portsmouth manager said.
Shaka Hislop? "Finished."
Arjan de Zeeuw? "From Wigan."
Valery Mezague? "Was going to go to Spurs for £4 million but had a car crash. He had bad head injuries and they thought he’d never play again. Then he came here and, on the day he was due to sign, his agent drove him out of the ground and headlong into another car."
That Redknapp has fashioned a good Premiership side from this assortment of write-offs is a salutary tale for those who believe romance is a mangled wreckage. "It’s a real kick in the teeth after last week’s result," Ferguson said. "This has destroyed us. It was a bad performance and a bad, bad result, but Harry has a decent set-up here and a lot of teams will struggle at Portsmouth."
If he was magnanimous, some of his players took it less well. Wayne Rooney continues to tackle like a super-caffeinated woodcutter and would have been sent off on another day for hacking away at opponents’ legs, while Alan Smith reverted to tyke. Nigel Quashie, a player who has often flattered to deceive but fulfilled his potential on Saturday, would have gone too, had he landed with an attempted punch at Rooney, and Roy Carroll’s late handball could have reduced the numbers further.
Thankfully, there were no dismissals to deflect from Portsmouth’s blossoming as a top-flight side. Ferguson told Rooney to stem the lava flow and United ended the game resigned to their fate. But for a fleet-footed opening, when they wove neat patterns that threatened to ensnare Portsmouth, and a gung-ho spell after the first goal, United’s impotency was marked. It was little wonder that Amdy Faye questioned their motivation after the emotion of last week ’s slug-fest and that Unsworth suggested United’s fear factor has gone.
Given Arsenal’s sudden fallibility and Chelsea’s transformation from coach park attendants to entertainment kings, nobody should dismiss United. Put it down to post-battle fatigue if you like, but it is a sign of where both these sides are that Redknapp was wrong when he said it was an incredible result.'