NATIONAL HERO NEEDS A HAIRDO

'He is carrying the weight of a nation on his shoulders and it is beginning to
tell on his head. The personal hairdresser of England captain David Beckham
arrives in Japan tomorrow to ensure that the inspirational midfielder looks his
best for this Friday's crucial quarter-final match.

Matters came to a head at the weekend when a torrential downpour during
the match against Denmark left Beckham's distinctive mohican hairstyle
looking rather shaggy and unkept, much to the embarrassment of his style
conscious wife Victoria. According to reports, Victoria, who is seven months'
pregnant and was watching the match on television at home, got straight on
the phone to Aidan Phelan, Beckham's personal hairdresser, to instruct him to
fly to Japan in the aid of the England cause and the famous Beckham barnet.

Mr Phelan, who runs the Strangeways Salon in Leigh-on-Sea, Essex, was
reported as saying: "Victoria rang me about cutting David's hair. It seems that
it needs a bit of a trim. Flying to Japan will certainly be my furthest home visit."

The arrival of Beckham's hairdresser has prompted rumours at the World Cup
that the footballer is about to cause the biggest surprise of the tournament by
unveiling a completely different and radical hair style when he leads the team
out on Friday.'

Just think of the panic amongst all those knobs who have copied the
Beckham Mohawk.