FERGIE IS A “SH*THOUSE”

Phil Neville was at the centre of an amazing riddle last night over a four-letter text blasting boss Sir Alex Ferguson.

The message, apparently sent from the footballer’s mobile, branded his Man United manager a “s***house” and called him “f***ing Fergie.

The Guardian’s take on it was:

It's the advent of 'to text' which probably dominates our language more than any other new jargon, a creation that also leads us into troubled waters once we start messaging people once we've had a few of an evening.

Still, it's also thrown up a mystery so cryptic and cunning that even the combined talents of Miss Marple and that detective played by Bergerac would struggle to solve. It's the riddle of the phantom texter, starring Phil Neville's phone and Sir Alex.

Amusingly, a message sent from the timid, quietly-spoken Man Utd star's mobile arrived at some random's inbox, branding Fergie a 's***house' and calling him 'f****** Fergie'. The Mill waits with baited, if slightly malodorous, breath to see what happens next.

Quite how all this could have happened may be explained by a post on the forum which runs as followed:

Phil Neville has been stitched up by a mobile phone hoaxer. A lad was given Neville's number and texted him saying "This is my new number, Al" - pretending to be Alan Smith. Neville allegedly texted back saying "Don't worry mate! ****ing Fergie is a shithouse. He's ****ed me off big time. U should be playing tomoz!" - but Neville denies it was him.